But Who Am I?

"Just go out there and be yourself." "So many fake people, be real."
These are examples of statements we hear more often than not, but there is a lot of detail to what they mean. Who is yourself? How can you go out there and be yourself when you do not know who you are in the first place, how can you call others fake and assume you are real when you do not know what real is?
Why do we even need to know ourselves? Can you truly know who you are? What defines who you are?

With looking at who you are we are focusing on identity of self. Are you what you do, an author, an Oscar award winner, a president, a cool kid, a curvy woman? Are you what others think you are? a tall person, a bubbly person, a sad person, an ugly person, a boring person? What really are you?

I can tell you what you are not, you are not your body form because if you are you should then look the same way you did on your birth day. You are not your personality because that changes as well, you were probably less confident in your teenage years but now that has changed. You are not your achievements because that can easily change or be taken away, achievements are simply expressions of the potential in you. You are not your beauty because that can be enhanced or deducted. One thing I come to learn is that who we are must endure through all changes, who we are should not change, who we are is a constant. How then can we find that and yet everyday we change, we grow, we learn. We already are who we are, the things that change are elements of that. How do we measure change in the first place, do you say you have changed because your perspective has changed,is it cause you have different goals , is it because you have lost or gained weight? How you measure change is different from time to time and from person to person.

God says I am. He describes Himself as unchanging, immortal, everlasting. This can only mean that only He knows who He is and we can never come to the full knowledge of who we are leave alone who He is when we are in this place, this world, this body because God is super natural and we are simply natural, we can not then completely fathom the super natural but only have a grip of it through the Holy Spirit, ( Ephesians 3..18) That is also why the Bible says if you see God you die Exodus 33.20. However we came into light about much more once Christ died and rose again, though we do not see or fully understand God , we have direct access to Him through prayer and scripture, this bridge is because of the blood of Jesus. Is it not crazy that Jesus Christ changed so many things! I would be so lost if He never came. I thank God for He reconciled and brought light to all things. Back to the topic. We may not know who we are and yet God knows us, He knows to detail who you are in the Physical , the Emotional, the Spirit and Soul,  and every other aspect(Psalms 119) . God can not change but we change, we change daily, whether positively or negatively, we change by getting older, by eating more, by seeing new things, by meeting new people, by dying by living to see another day, this then means we as ourselves can not define who we are. 


To find who we are we must go to Him who knows who He is to tell us who we are. What then does God say that we are and who will we become? The most straight forward scripture that says who we are is  found in Psalms139.14 " I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well." God made you and for Him to say you are wonderfully and fearfully made is out o

f this world, if you truly internalize those words you will never think less of yourself, you will never compare yourself and everyday, be it a bad hair day or a pimply face day you will look in the mirror and absorb in the master piece that you are. Further, is the fact that you were made by God and not just called into being, meaning that you are more valuable than things which God made by calling into being, you are more valuable than Queen Elizabeth's diamonds, valuable than the white house. You are priceless, your value can not be measured by money, 1 Corinthians 6.20,  explains  how you were bought by the blood of Jesus, the magnitude of this scripture is beyond amazing, the creator of the universe, shed His blood for you as ransom from shackles of death! You have become a child of God once you accept and live by His commands. You can not define yourself, you can not even comprehend who you are because it is beyond you and therefore you can only look to Christ daily in His word and through prayer to remind you and give you a better understanding of who you are. Because when you do that, you emancipate yourself from mental slavery, from untrue words by others, from your own lies Just as Galatians 5.1 says For freedom, Christ has set us free.Stand firm, then,and do not be subject again to the yoke of slavery. You become a person firmly footed, in peace, in patience, in love, in confidence, in all things that are good. You become real. You only go from strength to strength when He tells you who you are each moment. Once you know this , His will for you becomes clear, His revealed will for you in Scripture and His sacred and personal will for you. His will creates your purpose and purpose is in each moment, in every day achievements, it is not an ultimate situation you land upon one day,for only this moment is real, you have no guarantee of tomorrow,  purpose is the awareness of the gift of life and ability to do something out of that awareness.

Who you are also makes you realize who others are, and at that, unconditional love for others becomes something that is natural to you. Romans 15.7 Receive one another just as also Christ received you, to God's glory.

Romans 8.17 Now if we are children , then we are heirs- heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in His sufferings in order that we may also share in His glory. ( Seriously mind blown by that scripture!! WHAT! CO-HEIRS WITH CHRIST!!)

2 Corinthians 2.14 But thank God! He has made us his captives and continues to lead us along in Christ's triumphal procession. Now he uses us to spread the knowledge of Christ everywhere, like a sweet perfume.

2 Corinthians 5.7 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.

Exodus 3.14 God said to Moses, " I AM WHO I AM..."

Love always Hilda.

Brace Yourself for This is War

This past Friday I came home, very pleased about how my week had been. As I got into the house. I noticed my very hyper dog sitting and wagging his tail happy to see me. He Was SITTING! Max never sits, he has torn all my stockings and many of my dresses because of the way he jumps at me when he sees me every weekend when I come from school. He managed to stand and came to greet me and then I noticed his hind legs, all blood-clotted and stitched up. If you love your pets, you know how horrific it is to see your animal that way. I called mom immediately and she explained how a car hit Max and almost killed him on that Monday evening. Further, I went on to see if my pregnant dog Daisy was doing fine and I was told she had lost her  four puppies that Thursday, they were still born. I thought of what a rough week it had been for my dogs. I was told Max did not break even one bone and yet when they took him from the scene of the accident, they were certain that his legs were gone. The vet came and operated on Max till about midnight and in fact he is now walking, that dog is a fighter.

MAX

Now I am saying that to say this. I may sound insanely religious but the truth is, what happened to Max was a scheme of the enemy but the surpassing grace of God saved his every ligament and Max is alive. This past week has been especially good in the spiritual growth of each member of my family , the devil must have been so mad and wanted to discourage us by taking Max away but God in His mercy and protection saved our dog. The driver that hit Max had been over speeding and he stopped in shock then drove away as I was told. When God says in the Bible that what we fight against is not flesh and blood but spiritual he means it. Many people even Christians do not like to believe it, but through out the Bible we have seen that the sins of the world have been caused by the devil through our flesh. That is why God says die daily to flesh and live by The Spirit. Everything you do is influenced by either good or evil and the one that you feed is the one that wins. If you indulge your flesh, your flesh will overcome and you will be useful to the kingdom of darkness and if you indulge the spirit of God , God will remain in you and you will overcome all even the devil.

Ephesians 6 talks about the armour of God , get your Bible and read it. Live by the spirit and do not gratify the flesh. The flesh will only lead you to hell. The time is coming when the times will be so difficult for Christians in this life that many will give up their salvation. Be ready by setting a firm relationship with God and reading and praying without ceasing for the enemy the devil lacks around looking for someone to devour. Let God rule and intervene every aspect of your life. The prince of this planet is the devil, therefore he is gaining a lot of people on his side, he wraps Ugly in pretty little boxes by masquerading himself as an angel of light. Be aware of this, ask God to give you His persepective which is truth, may your eyes be opened. It will be easier not to get mad at people who offend you but instead you will pray for them for the Spirit of truth to be revealed in their hearts because we know that when people oppose you and you are a child of God, it is really the devil trying to discourage you. Be ready to pray for people instead of being disgusted by them, let the love of God overflow your heart.

Paul describes us as soldiers who should not get involved with civilian matters (2 Timothy 2.4 ). He did not use the word solider poetically, but because it is what we really are, we are hear on earth as people on a mission, fighting the good fight, running the good race. Taking orders from the King of Kings. Bringing hope to others through the hope of Christ in us. Therefore stop wasting time in civilian issues but instead fight the good fight and may you be found ready and mature on the day of the second coming of the Lord Jesus Christ.

Love always, Hilda.

Verses of this post

2 Timothy 2.3-4 Share in suffering as a good soldier of Jesus Christ. No soldier get entaganled with civilian pursuits, since his aim is to please the one who enlisted him.

Daisy and friends

Romans 8.37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

Galatians 5.16 So I say, walk by the Spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.

Ephesians 6.12 For our battle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the world powers of this darkness, against spiritual forces of evil in the heavens.

2 Corinthians 11.14 And no wonder, for Satan himself masquerades himself as an angel of light.

Luke 9.23 And he said to all, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me".

Those Quiet Little Days

Hi guys, it has been a little while since my last post. A little past three weeks.

One reason is, I just opened school and was settling in, another is I felt my last post was driven by experience and emotion instead of the Holy Spirit, I never want that to happen again.

Every Thursday is a free day for me in Uni, I have no classes on that day, I pretty much laze around the hostel, take a lot of tea and write in my diary, I meditate a lot and read the word of God. These Thursdays are always really amazing , sometimes in a happy way and sometimes in a sad way. Now this past Thursday was heavy, I got text messages from three different friends asking if I am doing ok and it only made it worse because I figured I was truly low in spirit and the Holy Spirit must have communicated. It was so bad that I was moody, I am rarely moody.

In my meditations I learnt a lot about myself, this life and God. Since I started this walk, my life has changed in a big way. I had a broken spirit without hope, my bones were drying up but now it is a broken spirit filled with hope in God's comfort.( For the creation was subject to frustration, not by its own choice but by the will of the one who subject it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God) On Thursday I sat in my bed taking my black tea and feeling bad about the things I had not achieved, the failures of my past and the separations of my present . It was difficult. The devil does steal, kill and destroy and that day he was set especially because I had dedicated the day for prayer. I am especially hard on myself when I set deadlines and do not meet them. In between the broken spirit and reading scripture, He shined. I can not tell you how much Jesus cares for you but my eyes well up with tears every time I think about it. Jesus is love, He is beautiful, gentle, He is warmth. Jesus is not of this world. Having an experience with Him is something that is truthful, it is something that cuts through your flesh, your bone, your soul and your spirit. He is The Great Love, He is comfort, He is the best of friends. Jesus Christ is light. If  your dreams have died, if your charisma has faded, if you are hopeless, if you have gotten ugly, if you are sick, if you held onto anything and there's never getting it back, you still have Jesus. It is ok, it will always be ok as long as you are a friend of God. If you have Jesus, you are blessed, you are fine, you are thriving. You may not think so because society dictates to be so many ways but if you have Jesus you have everything you will ever need.

The Lord, He draws all things to Himself, He has drawn Himself to you, hold onto Him, fill your mind, fill your heart, fill your stomach with Jesus. Let your lips speak unapologetically about Jesus. Never water down your love for Jesus. It is ok to be crazy about Him and for the world to know that you are. It is ok to be strange, conservative, hated, loved, cherished because you love Jesus. 

I want that glow, the Jesus glow. 

You know how we hear that Jesus loves us and He cares about us? Has anyone then ever told you that the devil, Satan, hates you, lies to you, wants you to gain the world and lose your soul, wants you to have a half experience of the truth, wants you to burn in hell for eternity? Now that I have, why do you still play on his side saying you're not yet ready to fully dedicate your life to Christ? Come as you are to Christ, with all your sin and weaknesses, come as you are, He is going to change you, just if you remain in Him. Be a friend of God and everything that is wrong is alright when you are a child of God.

Love always Hilda.

2 Corinthians 5.14 For Christ's love compels us, since we have reached this conclusion: If One died for all, then all died. 

Romans 5.8 But God shows His love for us that while we were still sinners Christ died for us.

Isaiah 55.1 "Come,everyone who thirsts, come to the waters, and he who has no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without price.

1 John3.1 See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know him.